When “I am Fine” Is the Biggest Lie We Tell Ourselves

I cannot tell you how many times I have heard someone say, “I am fine,” when everything in their body language, energy, and eyes said otherwise. We say it automatically. Reflexively. Sometimes without even realizing we are lying.

“Fine” has become one of the most socially acceptable ways to avoid the truth.

When I wrote Spiritual Bitch Slap, I was not interested in helping people feel temporarily better. I was interested in helping people get honest. And honesty often starts with recognizing that “fine” is not a feeling…it is a deflection.

Most of the time, “I am fine” really means:

• I am uncomfortable, but I do not want to rock the boat

• I am unhappy, but I do not know what to change

• I am exhausted, but stopping feels scarier than continuing

So we normalize dissatisfaction. We call it adulthood. Responsibility. Being realistic.

But here is the truth: your soul does not lie to you. It whispers first. Then it nudges. Then it gets louder. And when it is ignored long enough, life delivers what I call a spiritual bitch slap…not to punish you, but to wake you up.

The slap is not random. It is precise.

It shows up when you have been tolerating what no longer aligns. When you have outgrown an identity but kept wearing it because it was familiar. When you have been choosing comfort over truth and calling it maturity.

People often ask me, “Why did everything fall apart all at once?”
My answer is usually simple: it did not. You just stopped ignoring it.

“I am fine” delays healing. Honesty begins it.

You do not have to have all the answers. You just have to stop pretending you are okay when you are not. That moment of truth…quiet, uncomfortable, real…is where change actually begins.

If this resonates, this is exactly the kind of honesty explored in my book Spiritual Bitch Slap. It is not about fixing yourself…it is about finally telling yourself the truth.
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